Even when we as the Church seek to do ministry in fresh ways, we can have a tendency as the church to fall back into old unhelpful habits. We gravitate towards programs or things we do “for” the community rather than “with” them. We should be leery of just putting a new bow on the old ways of doing things and then labeling it a “fresh expression”.

As Luke Edwards says in his book ‘Becoming Church’ “when we treat people as recipients instead friends it leads to a relationship of unequal power, codependency, and manipulation.” So, much of church programming revolves around the “attractional model” of if we can just create the right environments, the right interests, and connect with people’s wants and needs then they will join us. However, as Edwards says this only creates recipients of what we can offer and not community with one another.

Why do we have a tendency to do this? For one, I think it is because it is easier to create something “for” people instead of “with” them. Secondly, it takes a lot more work to listen to others, to hear what is important to them. Thirdly, it causes us to let go of the control we so often desire. If we listen to our neighbors they may not want to do what we want to do. Lastly, it makes us uncomfortable. Churches are in the habit of doing what they know how to do and how they like to do it. To venture outside of this risks failure and the unknown.

So, what can we do? We can begin by listening, truly listening, not with an agenda, but with a desire to build relationships with our neighbors, to become friends, and to not view them as projects or recipients. Let’s begin this journey together!